Outfit

This, my friends, is called an outfit and is something of which I am very proud. It's not that I really have trouble dressing myself (although I have noticed I care less now), but I just didn't think it really mattered too much what Hannah wore. Who is going to come up and say "Your babies socks don't match. She is ugly. And you are a terrible person."? Babies are the definition of cute. This approach was not well accepted by my wife, especially when I would drive Hannah to meet her at the end of her workday, which she would follow with meeting friends. "You don't like the strawberry onesie with blue pants, and socks that are different colors, sizes, and even intended for different seasons? We were in a hurry."

At any rate, I have been trying. And now, for any similarly uninterested gentlemen, allow me to walk you through the above clothing choices.

I do not always enjoy dressing Hannah in pink. You understand why. I also cannot always find the bows that we use to avoid questions like..."Boy, right? - oh, well, that's what people assume when a baby has on blue." While green does not avoid this problem, it's not blue, and strangers take offence to baby girls in blue, as if you did it just to make them look stupid. Also it has a giraffe and lion on it. Who doesn't want their daughter to also love giraffes and lions? I'm sure this shirt is currently influencing her and her career choices - maybe someday I will get a safari out of it. That being said, I'm not sure how I feel about the message. Are giraffes and lions supposed to be friends? I find this doubtful, so then we can assume that they are supposed to be your baby's friends. This is perhaps even more troublesome. But that's not the important part - we're talking about matching clothes here.

So we have chosen a shirt. Green pants would be a mistake for several reasons. If they were exactly the same color then your baby becomes a little blob of green. Which is ok for Mom to do, if it is pink, but we have already ruled that out. If they don't match perfectly, then you end up looking like you tried to match them and failed. Yellow is far enough away, and I saw yellow pants within two seconds of opening the drawers. And here is the crucial part - there is yellow on the shirt. This means that baby goes from wearing clothes to having a cute outfit. You might be asking, this means something? Indeed. This means that Mom gets to spend her afternoon hearing "That is such a cute outfit!" instead of Mom saying "Her Dad dressed her." And Mom appreciates that, more than will ever make sense to you.

And I was just about to hit "Publish Post" when Heidi called to tell me what to dress Hannah in. APPRECIATE THIS!!